The Legend of the Camel Hump

Sham S. Misri

This is a funny and enjoyable extract from ‘How the camel got his hump’ from the Stories by Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936).

In the beginning of years, when the world was new all the Animals were just beginning to work for Man. Last of all, one day a Camel also came. He lived in the middle of a Howling Desert and did not want to work. He was a Howler and would eat sticks and thorns. When anybody spoke to him he would ‘Humph!’ and no more.

One day a Horse came to him with a saddle on his back and a bit in his mouth. The horse said, ‘Camel, come out and run like the rest of us.’ ‘Humph!’ said the Camel. Hearing this Horse went away and told the Man.

Next the Dog came to him. He had a stick in his mouth. The dog said, ‘Camel, come and fetch and carry like the rest of us.’ ‘Humph!’ said the Camel. Hearing this Dog went away and told the Man.

Now an Ox came to him. He had yoke on his neck. The ox said, ‘Camel, come and plough like the rest of us.’ ‘Humph!’ said the Camel. Then the Ox went away and told the Man.

At the end of the day the Man called the Horse and the Dog and the Ox together, and said, ‘Three, O Three, I’m very sorry for you (with the world so new-and-all); but that Humph-thing in the Desert can’t work, or he would have been here by now, so I am going to leave him alone, and you must work double-time to make up for it.’

That made the Three very angry. This worried them and they raised a fuss. They decided to have a meeting on the edge of the Desert. Soon the Camel came chewing twigs and laughed at them. Then he said ‘Humph!’ and went away again.

They then saw jinn in charge of All Deserts, rolling in a cloud of dust (Jins always travel that way because it is Magic), and he stopped near them.

Jinn of All Deserts,’ said the Horse, ‘is it right for anyone to be idle, with the world so new-and-all?’

‘Certainly not,’ said the jinn.

‘Well,’ said the Horse, ‘there’s a thing in the middle of your Howling Desert with a long neck and long legs, and he hasn’t done any work since. He won’t run.’

‘Well’ said the jinn, whistling, ‘that’s my Camel, for all the gold in Arabia! What does he say about it?’

‘He says “Humph!”’ said the Dog; ‘and he won’t fetch and carry.’

‘Does he say anything else?’

‘Only “Humph!”; and he won’t plough,’ said the Ox.

‘Very good,’ said the jinn. ‘I’ll humph him if you will kindly wait a minute.’

The jinn rolled himself up in his dust-cloak, and crossing the desert he found the Camel. I find you most idle. Looking at his own reflection in a pool of water.

‘My long and bubbling friend,’ said the jinn, ‘what’s this I hear of your doing no work, with the world so new-and-all?’

‘Humph!’ said the Camel.

The jinn sat down, with his chin in his hand, and began to think a Great Magic, while the Camel looked at his own reflection in the pool of water.

‘You’ve given the Three extra work ever since, all on account of your idleness,’ said the jinn; and he went on thinking Magic’s, with his chin in his hand.

‘Humph!’ said the Camel.

‘I shouldn’t say that again if I were you,’ said the jinn; you might say it once too often. Bubbles, I want you to work.’

And the Camel said ‘Humph!’ again. Having said it, he saw his back with a great big humph.

‘Do you see that?’ said the jinn. ‘That’s your own humph that you’ve brought upon yourself by not working. To-day you’ve done no work now from tomorrow you are going to work.’

‘How can I,’ said the Camel, ‘with this humph on my back?’

‘That’s made a-purpose,’ said the jinn, ‘all because you missed those days. You will be able to work now for days without eating, because you can live on your humph; and don’t you ever say I never did anything for you. Come out of the Desert and behave. And the Camel humped himself, humph and all, and went away to join the work. And from that day to this the Camel always wears a humph.

A pony of Amnu. (A Shirker )

Sham S. Misri
A pony of Amnu. The story is about a horse which belonged to the village Amnu. It is said that whenever a person would ride it, it would run towards a steep slope. Afraid of the fall, the rider would jump off the horseback and let the horse free. One day a professional rider was called. He rode the horse and the horse took him to the same slope as usual. The rider did not jump off the horse; instead lashed it hard. The horse stopped and did not jump on the slope. From that day on wards, the horse did not play this trick.) One who makes false excuses? (A shirker)

A Joke

Sham S. Misri

Two childhood friends who were studying together and had grown up together went for different jobs after having completed their academic courses. One became a businessman and the other an economist. One day the economist was walking through the green fields and pastures when he discovered that the person whom he met happened to be his childhood friend. Coming close near the person he told him if he could recognize him. The other man in the field immediately hugged him and asked about his welfare. Seeing the flock of sheep and lambs so cute, the economist wanted to take one home for his son.

The economist then told him that he was looking for the shepherd. Your friend in front of you is the shepherd. The economist then said, “If I can guess how many sheep you have, will you let me take one of these home?”

The shepherd said, “Of course.”

The economist looked around, made some calculations and after a few minutes said, “You have 879 sheep.”

The shepherd was shocked because he had exactly 879 sheep. In the heart of his hearts the shepherd was sad and angry.

While the economist picked up one the white fur animals and started walking, the shepherd said, “Wait a minute. If I can figure out what your job is, will you give me the animal back?”

The economist thought the guy would never figure it out as they had never met for over decades, and said, “Yes, sure.”

The shepherd looked at him and said, “I bet you are an economist.”

The economist totally shocked said, “How do you figure that out?”

“Because you picked up my dog.” Said the shepherd.

A Joke

Employee: Sir, I want 3 day leave.

Manager: If you want a leave, answer my question

Employee: Sure sir...

Manager: First tell me, why Bablu killed Bahubali?

Employee: May be Bahubali did not approve Bablu's leave?

Manager: Take 7 days leave, Enjoy.

The Legend of the Birth of Samba

Sham S. Misri

According to Devi Bhagavata Purana and Mahabharata, Krishna’s wife Jambavati had no son. She was unhappy as she was the only one who had not borne any child to Krishna while all his other wives were blessed with many children. She expressed her wish to Krishna to be blessed with a son. Lord Krishna then went to a sage who advised him to pray to Lord Shiva. Pleased with Krishna’s austerities, Lord Shiva finally appeared in the form of Samba, the half-male, half-female form of the god and asked him to ask a boon. Krishna asked for a son for Jambavati; Lord Shiva granted. A son was born to Jambavati and he was named as Samba. It was through his actions and anger that brought an end to the Yadu dynasty.

Lord Krishna wanted his son Samba to be exactly like Lord Shiva. However, Lord Shiva’s main function is to destroy creation and so for his son to be like Lord Shiva it meant that the child too would have to be the main cause of the destruction of his entire race, the Yadu Clan. No wonder, this was what Lord Krishna desired as the Yadus were unbeatable, the one who could not be defeated by anybody. Samba was not a nice boy. He was a nuisance to the Yadvas. His Marriage with Duryodhana’s Daughter (Kuru Clan) was a wrongdoing. He abducted Duryodhana’s daughter Laxmana on the day of her marriage. He had heard of her beauty and wanted to marry her though she had no interest in him. Samba was arrested by the elders of the Kuru clan and threw him in their prison. However, Balarāma (Krishna’s brother) rescued him out.

Samba Was Cursed By His Own Father

According to Skanda Purana some of Lord Krishna’s junior wives were infatuated with Samba. One wife Nandini even disguised herself as Samba’s wife and embraced him. For this, Lord Krishna cursed Samba to be inflicted with leprosy and his wives to be kidnapped by robbers after his death. Next, Samba got infected by leprosy. However, he got cured by worshipping Surya in the temple. All Sun temples are attributed to Samba.

Samba Was the Reason of Yadu Clan’s Demise. Samba once pretended to be a pregnant woman and his friends asked some sages that who will the child be. Offended by the mischief, the sages cursed that an iron pestle will be born to Samba and will destroy the Yadvas. The curse came true leading to the death of Krishna and his clan. The Bhagavata Purana records the weeping and crying of Krishna’s queens and their subsequent leap in Krishna’s funeral pyre immolating themselves as (sati). The Hindu epic Mahabharata describes the death of Krishna and end of his race and declares that Jambavati killed herself by burning alive after being attacked by robbers while leaving Dwarka after Krishna’s funeral.

The Magic Bread (A story)

Sham S. Misri

Long back a king in the guise of a common man once spotted a gang of criminals hatching a plot. Every member of the gang had some special power- one could put the guards to sleep, the second could open the lock of any coffer and the third could recognize a person any time after having seen him once. The disguised ruler got himself admitted to the gang on the plea that he too possessed a special power- he could save a man even from the gallows by merely shaking his beard. The king latter got them caught red handed and ordered them to be hanged. As they were being taken to the gallows, he appeared in his royal attire to ascertain their last wish. The one who specialized in recognizing people instantly grabbed the golden opportunity. He saved the lives of all the three by exposing a desire that the king should shake his beard.

The tale was narrated by the agriculture minister, Mr. Balram Jakhar, at a cabinet meeting to the then Finance Minister, Dr. Man Mohan Singh to concede a hefty 17 % increase in support of Kharif grains. After relating this story, Mr. Jakhar turned to the Finance Minister and said, “Manmohan, now shake your beard and save the farming community from doom!” And Dr. Singh readily obliged.